Here are 5 behaviors Black women tend to participate in more frequently than other female counterparts which perpetuate this staggering economic gap:
1. We treat boyfriends like husbands. We won't get on how many different ways this behavior is detrimental, but speaking financially, co-signing on loans and entering long-term agreements with someone who has not even attempted to commit to you on a long term basis is ridiculous. More times than not, Black women are left with the debt of a brother who has moved on and is driving his new girlfriend around in the car you still have to pay the note on.
2. We don't know how to say, "NO!" We tend to be givers by nature, but unfortunately we give until the point of self-deprivation. First to the church, then to bills and then to relatives and friends who have no means of paying us back. We believe that we are "helping" everyone around us from trifling siblings to grown children, but really we are enabling the people we love the most, not to mention damaging our own financial futures. Remember, the worst thing you can do for a broke person is become one of them!
Related Post: Is The Black Church Really To Blame?
3. We make our hair and nails a top priority. As Black women, being fly is definitely a priority, but can this be done on some type of budget? Are the nails with all the intricate designs that add an additional $10 to every pedicure really that important? Imagine what could happen if we rocked hairstyles and manicures that were less flashy and something we could maintain on our own in between appointments.
4. We buy children name brand clothing. Why should any infant or toddler be Gucci'd down? Children will not die from not having Baby Phat symbols across their chest. Name brand clothing is to impress your friends and strangers on the street who, quite frankly, really could care less. If you shopped at stores like Target, think of all the money you could actually put into that child's college fund!
5. We care too much about what our car looks like. Many of us are the first to graduate from college in our families and we want to make sure that everybody from the 'hood knows that "we've made it!" What's the easiest way to show this? A big flashy car that we can't even afford to replace a tire on. If you can't afford the maintenance on a vehicle, especially the preventative maintenance, then you can't afford the car. It's really that simple!
It's time for Black women to wake up and pay attention to what's really important in life. What's the point in looking like a million bucks, when you're barely worth a hundred?
Until Next Time,
Seek Wisdom, Find Wealth & Be Blessed!
83 comments:
Keep preachin', please!! It means 10 x's more coming from a black woman, than a black man with an Armenian wife. All of a sudden any constructive criticism from a black man translates to hating black women and being an uncle tom. Much more effective coming from you. And emphasize giving to the church.....true story;
A friend of mine can't pay her car note, asks to borrow some money. I know she just paid. I ask what's going on......"I went to church yesterday and the holy ghost just filled me up and I gave a little extra tithing". That's why she was short on her $640 car note.
Kudos to you Patrice!! A rockin' article that I hope every single/married BLACK women in this country is able to read. Thank you for speaking the truth. I hope "we" are receptive and change our spending behaviors. Ladies, lets find another focus. In the end, it's only about our personal relationships w/ God that will truly matter, not how we're perceived by this world.
You are so right on Patrice. I get a pedicure once every 3 months and in between I do it myself. I do my own hair. But I do remember when I was young and dum and giving to the so-called boyfriend and learning my lesson very quickly when I couldn't pay my car note and I had to borrow from my girlfriend. Do you know that Negro never paid me back. The last time I saw him was in a club and don't think I didn't ask him. Just know that I learned my lesson quickly.
I will definitely stay tuned in to HelloBeautiful.com.
Patrice, thank you so much for writing this article this is sooo true! I am a black woman from NYC and I'm always thinking how can I contribute more to my 401k plan etc. I no longer drive but when I do decide to get another car it could quite possibly be an "environmental" friendly car and used. We all like nice things however; in moderation. I'm not going to eat catfood when I retire to try to impress some ppl that aren't doing as well as I am financially anyway. And Black women ALL of us are Beautiful in our own way so we will SHINE just as much as we do in a Honda as we will in a Benz....I know do. ;)
Say it again, sis!!! I don't understand the need for some sistas to walk around all dolled up ALL the time. Maybe it has something to do with bruthas, though, because I see couples of other races where the woman is so plain, it's hard to tell she's female. In spite of that, their walking along, holding hands in their matching jackets and jeans and looking happy as all get out. We need to concentrate more on the INSIDE than what's on the outside . . .
What an insightful read. Direct and to the point.
What really irks me about black women and their need to take care of their men financially is that this happens on ALL income levels. There are many sisters who are on government assistance getting welfare, section 8, food stamps, WIC, etc. who will (essentially) share their assistance with a lazy, trifling, no job having man who lives in said government housing and eats said government cheese with a Cheshire grin. The only thing that he is good at contributing is his seed that results in an increase in their bounty.
I’ve even heard some sisters lament that they can’t ‘take care of their man’ as if that’s their duty. What has happened to women that they have allowed these type of men to flip the script on them in such a way that they are believing that they are suppose to carry not a part of the burden, but ALL of it? Why are they too eager to give these men the easy way out? Are they that desperate and lonely that they’ve allowed common sense to completely evaporate from their senses?
I suspect it begins with an over-indulgent mother who could never deny their son anything. Strangely, this same mother raises her daughter to be independent, to get hers, to fight all of the windmills, to slay all of the dragons. The sons are made to be dependent lotharios who learn that saying pretty things get them the best things that life has to offer. I’m not blaming all mothers….but looking at the number of broken men that populate this country…it’s no small number.
Women…start making these men accountable. If you see that he is happily unemployed, keep stepping. Please stop thinking that you can change them; like Oprah says, if he shows you who he is….believe him. You don't have to compromise your principles to have love in your life. You deserve better….start acting like it!
Thank you thank you thank you..it's amazing in this economy with all the info out there about living within your means that so many sisters are still trying 2 live a Beverly Hilla lifestyle on a $35k-45K annual salary. I kind of blame Essence magazine's web site. Have you ever log onto their site and seen such foolish articles As Closet Envy which is about the closet of a celebrity with a lot of "extremely overpriced" designer clothes. Also about the latest nonsense regarding "overpriced weaves" etc. 2 many everyday people pay 2 much attention 2 stupid reality shows and all the physical trappings that those folks have and want that stuff. Stop the insanity
I am worth more than all of the riches on earth and may not have ten dollars. However; those are some reality points. Same goes for men also.-*living proof*-
So you have presented reasons why black women cannot save money. But there is no advice on HOW TO SAVE MONEY.
Here goes the studies show thing again. I think people should stop doing studies comparing ethinicities to each other. For example: "why black women can't find jobs. Studies show 87% of black women cannot find employment compared to caucasian women or other women other than black women.There is a percentage of all women no matter what their ethinicity is that have problems saving money. A women period can not be able to save money because of helping an ailing or disabled relative.
This is Generalization and it is wrong. When you google this article it's being paraded around alot of sites dealing with black women, especially on interracial dating sites that black women are on. I believe this article is an attack on black women in general.On some sites it shows african-american celebrity women. Those women can afford to spend thousands everyday, who are you to place pictures up of Rich celebrities that can afford that and speak for all black women. Not all black women can spend like that.
Although I found this article somewhat interesting, I also found it to be a bit offensive. If I had the time, I could take each and every one of the reasons and counter it, however, I will not do that. Perhaps because some of the information may apply to a lot of people (they know who they are)so it may be helpful. As a black woman with her own successful business, I was taught by my parents how to survive with what I had. It was never about keeping up with the Jones or impressing anyone but MYSELF. Articles such as this may be helpful but the generalization factor is what I don't agree with. We are all not the same.
It is hard for me to believe that a woman cannot save money. Especially a beautiful black woman. I know too many that have guys pay for their cars, rent or mortgage, clothes, dates to restaurants, movies, and etc. I really do not understand it. In my eyes, a lot of women should not be broke. Then again, I am that nice brotha that a lot of women will sleep on and go get that young thug who does not want to work. I love you my sistas, but still do not understand your choices in men.
I tried to talk to 'em. Pray for 'em.
I too find this article quite offensive. It's always about what us black women can't do, damn to hear the world say it black women suck. I'm an educated black woman who will not and I repeat will not take care of someone else's grown behind male child besides my own. I do buy my child nice things because I can afford too, and yes I get my nails and feet done and I don't think it comes out of anyone's pockets but mine. I worked hard putting myself through nursing school just so I could give my child as well as myself the things in life I wasn't able to get as a child. I'm not out here trying to live a Beverly Hills life on a Good Times budget, but I will pamper myself however I see fit and its noone's business to say other wise. Yes I do have a savings account just in case you needed to know that. Some black women can do for herself and her offspring without going broke.
Those who reject this article the most are probably the ones it applies to the most. Black women hate hearing the truth.
Ok I don't believe n dis 5 REASON BLK WOMAN CAN'T SAVE MONEY... OK EVERY BLK WOMAN ISN'T DA SAME... Sum of da things dat was wrong was a lot of things I don't do wit ma money.. I do have a child dat I must provide for.. I do buy him name brand things but not sumthing I kno will put a damper n ma pocket when ma rent due or bill due. I guess by me only being 26 yrs old I really haven't experience much but I do kno I'm not dumb enuff to put a man b4 ma child esp when I kno he's not promise to me dats just ma personal opinion
I find this article and many like it that are posted to be offensive. Almost every article about black women today speaks negatively towards women of color. I have not come across one that has given the correct image of me or the type of women I surround myself with. What's even worse, every article I've read puts these stereotypes on black women when quite frankly these stereotypes can fit any woman from every racial background. It's not about the color of you skin, it's about how you were raised. I am too tired of articles that negatively focus on one race in a bad way.
I agree wholeheartedly. I just did a radio show about this very topic callLand Rover/Landlord - the African American Wealth Gap. www.soundcloud.com/tifftalks Make sure you listen to parts I & II.
Every single day ,I promise myself I will not read this type of articles, most of the time I dont, but this theme was catchy so, I read it. Im a black woman(not born in the US, father was a military), so it seems I had the fortune to be raised in another place. When you write articles like this instead of being constructive , they just fill more the stereotype that the american society gave to black people. I know white, asians that cant save money, and in the other hand I know black people that are good savers. So what its the point with this type of articles. And about church, if you dont know something dont talk abot it. If you read your Bible you will know the 10% is for the Lord, but thats just for people that believe and dont do it like a type of investment,like God I gave you this and You now have to give me this, it doesnt work that way, the other thing here is that people sometimes use the Holy Spirit as escape goat when they made the wrong choices. Im a true believer God provide all my needs and keep me safe and healthy , not able to do anything without Him. Being a medical doctor you learn a lot from every patient, no matter the race, and its so bad to know that black people treat black people worst than other races. When will all us will start understanding that its just one race HUMANS... SELFISHNESS AND TRYING TO FIT IN PLACES THAT YOU ARE NOT SUPPOSSED TO BE LEAD PEOPLE TO WRITE THIS TYPE OF STUPID ARTICLES.
To the writer dont generalized thats why people from other races things all black men or women are bad. Yes there are irresponsible people everywhere no matter the color of your skin.
But for the members of this site that are intelligent , let us keep doing what we do everyday to lift up the image of Black people in this society, with our hard work and teaching our kids so they become better men and women in the future. Help your kids with their school projects and homeworks.
As a general overview, this was on point. And no, it's not all black women, nor is it only black women. But in every stereotype, there's a grain of truth and this one gets it. The best thing we could give our children is a sound financial mind - teach them to save and invest, and not just on their appearance. Work your own gig as a kid to learn the value of it. Loved the article!
Blessed Be
What's with the negativity ladies? If it doesn't apply to you, it doesn't apply to you...It's quite simple. Personally, I believe the article held some truth. Though it is not indicative of Black women in general, it touches on points that I'm sure some can relate to.
I''m inclined to say that this article is a bunch of mess. Truthfully, color has not one thing to do with it. It is all abou the person and how they handle their money. I work for a living in the social services arena and let me tell you... there are some TANF recipents who believe that they should have the Baby Phat, etc., exclusively. Me, I buy whatever the local stores sell and spend my money on the healthiest of food. And I'm still broke. Why? Cause I don't earn enough money to save anything. That's why! Nothing else! It has nothing to do with my skin color, or even my lack of education for that matter. It's just a simple matter of economics. I live in an economically depressed neighborhood and jobs here don't pay that much. Therefore, there's nothing to save/nothing to squander. Period.
Here we go with another article about BLACK women and needless to say it has to be negative...in all honest I know several woman that fall into this category and they are not all BLACK. My question is what is the point of this article? Are you offering some type of intervention/guidance? Or is this jus another article to make black women seem like we don't have it together...let me know
this article is on point for some of us.
1. nails is not a priority. if i can't afford to get my hair done i buy a $30 wig that i'll use for almost 2 mos or more.
2. i ain't co-signing jack. if he gonna leave me because i won't - so be it.. at least my credit will still be in order.
3. i drive a 1997 truck w/no rims, no booming system or even a portable dvd in it.. as long as it drives - i'm good.
4. My kids don't have 2 wear brand names. if it's cute, and affordable i buy it.. brand name who say what?!
5. i don't loan money to family.. learned that the hard way, unless it's my mother..
Good Afternoon
Please let me not disrupt the views that this is true for all black women, because there are some of us who work 12 hr shifts to help a son or dtr with purchase of books that their Grant money or Scholarships did not cover and the money lift to pay bills like the rent, lights, food and if you lucky to get your hair done it may come in a do it yourself book. Some women have good paying jobs and time have cause them to spend more on the little things like cleaning product, bathe soap, toothpaste and yes the most important thing deodorant. I worked hard for my children even when they said you have breast cancer, so if my children received designer clothes I received a Honor Roll Student that has a degree in Sport Wellness, Pre-Medical and Chemistry, Medical Records Technology, so please do no lump all black women in this category, because we all have different reason for not being able to save money, some good reason and some selfish reason. God did not make as all alike so why would you classify us all in one category. Thank you, for taking the take to read this comment. For those that agree have a bless day and for all those do not agree with me may God continue to lead you in the right directions and you have a bless day as well/tb
This article is on point to those women who are neglectful with their fiduciary responsibilaties. So if this article offends you, then it probably applies to you. So don't get offended, but rather be realistic about what amount of money God has really blessed you with to have for your needs and not wants. It's that simple.
Being and educated sister with an advanced degree and surrounded by educated sisters either in pursuit of or possession of advanced degrees, I can say that this article is a generalization that continues to present a negative image of black women. I can tell you from doing a paper on the subject, that the main reason black women have problem with saving money is because no matter what level of education we obtain, we are always the lowest paid in comparison to other races. So if we don't make the money that women of other races make to begin with, we are going to have problems saving. True, some women of all races squander their money on trying to look good, name brand clothes and on helping others who never pay you back, but that is women of all races, not just black women. This article gives the impression like so many others that are being circulated around the internet, that it is just women of color who do these things when it can be a woman of any color. It is articles like these that make it difficult for a successful sister to find a man that is her equal as men are being bombarded with articles like these and believe that every sister he meets is going to be like the women he reads about. Thankfully, I have a brother who saw me, bald head and all and never read any of these articles. Now he has a woman with a net worth of over $40k, my own home, car paid for and educated and drama free. He wants me to retire so he can take care of me like a man is supposed to do. Yes he is a black man!
First, let me say I appreciate EVERYONE's feedback.
I'd like to bring a few points to light for those who read somewhere that this was true of ALL Black women. There is no place in this entire post where I have stated that as fact. In fact, I said that we "tend to participate in more." That doesn't mean that we ALL do it, because I actually don't myself nor do many of my immediate friends. It also doesn't mean that women from other cultures don't do it, as well.
For those that think this is not an issue even amongst "educated" women, you are sadly mistaken. I speak to college aged women on an ongoing basis and I think as adults, we all know that going to college doesn't automatically make you financially saavy. Most of the women I coach actually have college degrees and for some reason or another still make poor decisions with money.
At the end of the day, as Black people, in general, our mindset towards money and wealth creation needs to be reshaped. If this article wasn't for you, then cool, but I get the e-mails weekly from women who have seen themselves in one of my posts and desire to do better, but didn't even recognize how bad it was until they read it. So for those of you who ask, "Why would (you) write something like this?," I wrote it for the Black women who needed a reality check. If thats not you, then KUDOS to you in all sincerity, but trust me, it's for someone.
Thanks again for the feedback.
PCW
I only agree with point number 2. I had to learn to say no to a family member whose controlling and manipulative ways has cost us both a relationship. I don't have a boyfriend or a husband and if I did, I aint taking care of no grown man. Brother has to have his life together. I had to work for mine. My hair is natural and I keep my nails up myself. I don't have any kids and I don't spend a lot of money on myself. Fashion is where you find it even if it means shopping at the local Walmart or payless. I don't have a car. Publc transit works just fine. This article clearly does not apply to all black women but I am sure some of us are in agreement.
Sounds like a lot of you are fulfilling another stereotype that black women are often more angry and offended than most other women of other races. Look. there are plenty of women who do the right thing. But, in my opinion, based on what Ive seen, this article IS correct. I have two kids of my own and two steps. It took me some time to convince my ole lady to shop for those really good deals like 30, 50 70% Off of clothes and shoes. She once spent 40$ on a pair of pants for our son from GAP kids and he was only 9 months at the time. I thought that was real stupid considering she could have gotten maybe an outfit and a half for that price. I know I could. Some of you keep using your kids as an excuse to spend the little you have. Just because your a nurse or have some high educated degree does not justify spending like that on your kids. Theres nothing wrong with your child getting a part time job to make up the difference for those books or loans. that cant be covered by you or grants. Some of you talk about GOD but you misinterpret the meaning of the word. GOD does say give 10%. but also says that he will understand if you cannot contribute at that time. Im willing to bet none of you really investigate where in your church or community that 10% goes. Thats exactly why your pastor has a better house and car than you. Secondly, If your GOD FEARING, then you all should understand GOD wants you to be rich in spirit and knowledge, not worldly things created by man! You feel if you have a little bit of good fortune that it was GODS will be donel. No, it was your will and determination to be engrossed with the evil of Man. An extremely passionate relationship with what will certainly be the worlds end. GREED, ENVY, and MATERIALISTIC ENGORGEMENT. You just put that kind of wanting on GOD to justify it when It comes to you. GOD Says if you sacrifice the next world for this, then I WILL giveth of what you ask. The best thing you can give your kids is an education of LIFE, GOD, and there own history to carry on the black legacy and your own legacy. Its ok to pamper yourself time to time but to become habitual with it is to shorten your life spirit and change your soul. Your right, it is your own business how you spend your money, but dont cry to mama when an emergency comes up and you have less in savings then you could have had for that emergency.
After reading this article and most of the comments, I've decided to weigh in. As a financial professional who teaches financial literacy classes, I can honestly say I see the truth in this article. I'll also say that maybe it should have been titled "Why SOME Black Women Can't Save Money" - SOME being the operative word. On a daily basis, I see young Black women who think it is more important that they have the newest club wear, their nails and hair done, their kids in name brands and their men looking better than them. These are the same women who come into the bank and want to borrow money to payoff "his" bills but have no savings for themselves or their kids. Some of these women are college educated and some are on assistance. They all share one similarity, lack of financial education. Some women have not been taught to save or invest their money, so as a result they miss out on building wealth. They are doing what they saw the other women in their life do. Education about money is going to be the key to changing generations of poverty and ignorance. It is not enough for us to just identify a problem, each of must also be part of the solution. For each of the women who expressed their concern for this article and its message and who also stated how they treat their money, I challenge you to teach the women in your life how to get on your level. We are our own best resource and honestly, I learned from a few of the posts, please pass on your knowledge to the next woman.
This is absolutely right. Even if the man in our life is our husband, the man needs to know how to handle his financial business like a man.
Giving to the church isn't going to get a person into heaven, no matter what the preacher says; nor will the church bail you out when you're in financial trouble. Giving or loaning to friends and family is a matter of trust and that takes really knowing the person.
Spending excessive amounts on hair and nails, along with the excessive amount of time you have to waste sitting in a Black owned salon isn't worth it. Learn to do your own hair and grow your own nails.
My momma used to tell me that if you need to wear someone else's name on your butt, you lack self-esteem. I think that speaks volumes. Not saying I don't buy some designer labels, but only if I get a really great deal. Try the outlet malls; got a Liz Claiborn dress for $12 instead of the $120 list price. Also, why give your money to brands that publicly state they don't want us buying their stuff?
As long as my car does what it's supposed to do, I'm happy and so are my kids.
To the Anonymous poster who suggested the alternate title of "Why SOME Black Women. . .," I truly appreciate the feedback and will keep it in mind next time around. I hoped it would be obvious that this couldn't mean ALL black women, but clearly it wasn't, so I've learned a great lesson!
Thank you for also making the point that "Some of these women are college educated and some are on assistance. They all share one similarity, lack of financial education."
Important to keep that in mind. I see it EVERYDAY.
Wonderful article! My best friend is a licensed hairstylist who takes care of my hair. I dont pay the regular salon fees at all! I'm a professional artist, so she calls me to help her kids with their school projects. We trade services. I go to the nail salon once a month, and handle my pedicures myself. Also, cutting out a lot of unhealthy relationships, foods, drinks, etc. helps to keep the pockets full. Also, who needs to live in the club? The money you save on drinks and entrance fees can do a lot for the savings account. In this economy, we have to be conscious about our future. Instead of wasting your time, turn a talent or hobby into a business. Visit mine @ www.afrodityproductionsllc.com.
HELLO PATRICE FIRST THING I WANNA SAY IS THAT I LOVE LOVE UR POST,EVERYTHING YOU SAID IS TRUE N SOME WOMEN NEED A REALITY CHECK,N YOU KNOW WHAT THEY SAY THE TRUTH HURTS,IM ONE OF THOSE FEMALES WHO GETS MY HAIR N NAILS DONE,BUT ONLY WHEN I CAN AFFORD TOO,YOU SEE I AM CAPABLE OF DOING MY OWN HAIR WHEN I NEED TOO N I ALSO HAVE NICE NAILS N YES THERE MINE,AS FAR AS THE COMMENT ABOUT GIVING MY MONEY TO A MAN,NEVER MY TWO KIDS ALWAYS COME FIRST..N THIS IS TOO THE MANY WOMEN WHO GOT OFFENDED BY YOUR COMMENTS ITS BECAUSE YOU WERE TALKING ABOUT THEM..YOU KNOW THE OLE SAYING ..IF IT DON PPLY ..LET IT FLY..GOOD JOB PATRICE
LMAO...wow 5 reasons a "Black" women cant save HER money and #1 is a "Black" man...c'mon are we still blaming others for our mis-fortunes the #1 reason should be that they spend it soon as they get it on weaves,nails and expensive designer pocketbooks while feeding the babies pre-packaged foods and dyed sugar water.
#1 reason is its the Man's fault??? Im married now but while dating ive always paid, i always treat, no matter how small or big. I live in NYC and if your not paying your not playing thats the bottom line everyone knows that...lol, maybe theres women who fall for a gigolo's game but for the most part its not happening. Maybe if they stopped being so superficial and worrying about what type of car IM pushing and who made my shirt and jeans then they would be able to see the bigger picture. With all of the dudes out there paying various utility bills, treating to steak dinners and low budget shopping sprees all while picking you up in the fancy car because see, she wont date you without any of that, they should'nt be complaining. Look in the mirror for the cause of your problems
Ok, from a male's POV: First off, some of you so-called EDUCATED females seem unable to read and comprehend that this article is NOT being stereotypical, but generalized, which means it applies to some, but not ALL! Next, how can you find something offensive although it has many truths to it? FACE THE FACTS: alot of black females these days are dishing out money for a bum male, or would rather LOOK good than to save and invest. It's the NORM for most young black females! Maybe this is why blacks are dog-eat-dog, simply because we DENY the personal issues of our OWN PEOPLE! I assume that we think everyone is A-ok! Well, you're completely wrong! I've seen these issues LIVE and even worse than these! Oh, and by the way...who's to say they don't have pages about why hispanics don't have this/that, or asians can't do this/that? Are you omnipresent and know every article in the universe? Education does not equal wisdom/common sense I see. SMH
You know what, you're not lying at all. As a black woman and a mother myself, I do my own hair and nails to look good and save money at the same time. Also, I don't get it when some of these parents who buys their newborn, infants and toddlers Jordans and they gonna wear them for a couple of months, that's $50-$100 down the drain right there. They have better looking clothes at the Children's Place, Target and Wal-Mart. Every single black woman need to read this article and take notes.
What I wanna know is: why is this article just now hitting my inbox March of 2011, when it was written LAST YEAR!? (Oct 2010) and why are comments taken on Blogspot and not a reputable site?! Is this all just one bloggers opinion?! I'm offended by it too; I make 6-figures, have thousands in liquid assets, owning a home, (that's not in foreclosure; blacks, whites, others affected), have excellent credit, car paid off, no children, still shop at payless, but have traveled the world (paid for by my own dollars) and all my trust (besides my tithes and offerings) put in God...so yes, I am offended. "Generalization" is an understatement! This article was poorly written with such implied antics similar to stereotypical neck rolls and teeth sucking gossiping black women in beauty salons. What's even more sad is that this is detriment is publically
displayed for all ethnicities to read, painting such a distorted view of black women as the videos on MTV and BET, thereby stomping further down black people and women into nothingness. All I can do is *SMH*
Saudia Cullins, Maryland
I would like to add some depth to this article and bring some insight on WHY these things ring true for not all but many black women today.
1. Black women don't understand the true value of money and the power it posses. Where our white counterparts are more likely to be raised in households whom find it vital to educate there children about how money is to be used and not abused. We are forced to then as adults self educate or
fail financially..I can go on...
2. Black women veiw men as a possession not a partner! "He's mine"...this mentality helps us understand why protecting this possession is so important...give him everything he wants and just maybe he won't leave for the next. This theme is carried out in just about every form of
media, images, thoughts, concepts...etc that touches us, forming our veiws and percpectives about how we should BE and act.
3. In the words of India Arie "I am not my hair..." black women have accepted this crazy notion that they are supposed to be made up of big butts, fly hair and the lastest fashions! Once again this stems from how they were raised to "fit in" it would behove you to "look white"...you'll never get a man that way. If BLACK MEN
would start teaching their daughters the true meaning of beauty from day one...as adults these women would be unmoved by societies status quos.
So to all the respondants of this article, don't take it personal if this is you, recognize it for what it is and if it benefits you to change your behavior...do so.
I am not sure if this article is supposed to be taken seriously, or it's just a joke. But these are all blanket stereotypes about black women--RIDICULOUS. Maybe in your circle this is the case. Instead of wasting time to bash yourself by writing a useless article that does not offer anything to black women. Why not offer tips on how black women can save money, especially if you and your friends fall prey to some of the things you outlined?
my2sense...
I am one of those black women who have a hard time saving. So, I thank you for the reminder. I need to get back on track and say NO to some of my wants (entertainment) for the most part and eating out. I don't spend money on a man ( I have in the past) or children ( I don't have any), but I do spend money on family members. I will re-do my budget and reconsider how I spend.
Thank you,
This article is speaking to many and people should take from it what you can use and leave the rest? I identified with at least 2 or more points and fit this group for different reasons, nevertheless can relate. I've never been into the nail/pedi's and the hair never top priority to go to salons, thank God for today's wig collections, lol. Name brands were in younger yrs before having children. People always compliment my style and how my children looked, but it was all due to bargain shopping, be pratical. You don't have to spend a million bucks to look like it. While I didn't get a degree I still managed to earn a decent salary as a single parent. Both children went to college and it was not easy and one still in school and since the recession, no increase in 3yrs, doing more with less? We women can be resourceful that way and make a way out of no way. I pray that changes someday but I've been blessed in spite of. One thing in our culture - AA prior generation didn't the tools to educate on saving $$? SOME not I just speaking from my experience. Great article, thanks for sharing it.
I agree with Nabina. As a 26 year old black woman who owns a home and a car in NyC (the car is paid off) this article is a little ridiculous. You mean to tell me you all think we're 41k behind white women because we like relaxers and gucci baby shoes? You have a valid point about the late model cars. But having been to quite a few office babyshowers for white expectant moms I can tell you they enjoy the finer things as well.
Just because you preface the article by discounting disparities in income and education doesn't diminish its significance. It is still the PRIMARY reason for the wealth divide. Add to that generational wealth (they graduate with less student loans because their parents had more; more likely to get familial help with a down payment on the 1st home, etc.), the fact that single usually means childless for white women (black women...not so much) and you have recipe for some broke ass sistas.
So while my networth is apparently more than the average white woman's I too am offended by this article.
I came across this article from another website but was intrigued, not offended by the title. There are some very valid points but I do believe the #1 reason is financial illiteracy that leads to the other reasons listed in the post. I've taken a personal stance against financial illiteracy and am fervently applying what works for me. I have also had numerous conversations with my younger relatives on my financial mistakes and how to prevent them.
I once heard an Atlanta radio personality mention a notable quote with Susan L. Taylor (former Essence editor) about what we spend on clubs and how much real estate we could have, if those funds were re-directed. Honestly the only people making money in the clubs are the club owners, promoters, hosts, DJ's and club employees (hopefully).
5 reasons black women can't save money...
#1 Shoes
#2 Handbags
#3 Nails
#4 Car
#5 "more" Shoes
I'm just sayin'.
You left out the top 3 Reasons...
1) Children-they're expensive to raise even in a married family, but sisters don't even try to find a good husband before they start having them.
2) Never taught money management growing up. Many of us come from families that lived check to check & just aren't used to having anything.
3) Capitalism-our entire culture is built on consumers spending money they don't have on stuff they don't need and can't afford. It's the American way.
I was so dissapointed reading this "article" the most valid point was the hair & nails. I also agree with the designer children clothing. I am a 25 year old black woman...My children and I stay fly...I do our hair,my daughters styles, and my sons cuts...we shop first at the thrift store and on to anywhere else that has what we need. I don't understand the need to compare race...but, I guess...one person above made the best points...We need to really push the education factor, since the wealth is in our Country for the taking...you can have all these material things. However budgeting and planning should have priority over trying to impress folks...Also, paying a tithe is imperative to weealth. Even major corporations understand the law of sowing and reaping. We tithe and also give...and the car has ALWAYS been paid...but, I just really wdould have liked to see more facts on this article, just in case a young black woman came across it...it may have helped her...
Some people commenting here are thick. Not once did the article indicate that this applies to ALL Black women. It's obviously a general statement. And even though none of these apply to me, I totally see where she's coming from.
Also, most people that have a problem with statistics are those whom they apply (or applied) to or folks who'd rather hide their shame than share their pain. Everything mentioned here is THE TRUTH. It may not be YOUR truth, but it's obviously someone else's truth -- be it your cousin, your mama, your best friend, your co-worker or the female you sat next to on the train this morning and rolled your eyes at.
Some Black folks are so quick to holla "stop tearing each other down" when someone points out our shortcomings a whole but would be the LAST person to try to bring someone else up in a positive, truthful manner. Get a grip!
Loved this article and I forwarded it 100 times. So Nah!
Man, I tell you, us black women must be made up of so many things...first we are gold diggers...now we are women who take care of men...then we are successful women who cant find a man. lmao...im over it.
Sometimes the truth hurts, it can be hard to face but,it also sets you free. Come on ladies everyone knows one or more persons be it a family member,friend or perhaps even themselves that can relate to at least one of these "5 reasons". The author is speaking to and about Black women thus the title but, yes it does cross all races and even economic lines. Don't get angry because the truth is written, instead use the information to help someone else or yourself to get out of this way of life.
anonymous has a twin
I am a nurse as well , I have adopted two children , and I am currently not married , or in a relationship . The thrift store is my Best friend , and I don't believe in renting . I also spend cash . I don't own a credit card , if I can't buy it , I don't need it ! Men are clearly another topic , they can ONLY do what is allowed by the female, and I am currently in waiting . I have seen how things work out when I choose my own ! LMBO
I just found this post and I 100% agree with what you wrote. I see it everyday, a lot of black women have to have name brand purses/shoes, hair and nails done, etc. but they don't even have their own home or car, and struggling from day to day. I know when some of my friends got their tax checks they blew it on flat screens and laptops and are back trying to figure out how to pay their next bill, smh.
An interesting article. There are two main reasons why some people are unable to save money.
1. Not prioritizing.First things first.
2. Not understanding the difference between a need and a want. A need is something that you must have in order to survive(food, shelter and water).
Every month the necessity (a need) bills must be paid FIRST, such as mortgage/mortgage ins., car note/car ins.,groceries, utilities(electricity, gas,water).
Secondly, an amount should be placed in a savings at a FDIC financial institution.
There are numerous reasons why SOME people (black, white, brown, young, old, male and female)are unable to save money, and the author just stated five reasons of black women.
I do not understand why all the negative responses.
All races or ethnicity of women share these same afflictions.
But this article was excellent for all the ladies. STOP DOING THESE THINGS LADIES!
This is so true...so true. I use to make my nails and hair with the designs a priority, I had to have my hair done every week! I realized I could save a lot of money by wearing press ons and wigs!
There was a comment about a reader that didnt understand how race played a factor. Come on...we all know black woman are way flashier than white woman. White woman get manicures. Black woman get a $60 lay over. Black woman get 20" rims from Rent a tire. White woman buy the car with "factory" rims. Black woman want to put their new born babies in Jordans. White woman put those univeral white booties on their babies. Black woman will co sign for a man they have been in a relationship with for 6 months, he has bad credit, not a good work ethic, and barely can afford to give you the extra to get your nails done. White woman get the ring first, then make them sign a promisary note just in case this thing may fall through. So yes, race does play a factor in the way we spend our money and on the things we spend it on. P.S I am a black woman that fell victim to some of these things mentioned in the article so I definatley can relate.
Or They are trying to keep up with the Jones. I am a Realtor in Illinois and soon to be Broker in Illinois and Georgia. I see black women with horrific credit. How do you owe Sprint $2000. dollars? Its only $175. to break the contract. Pay the damn $175. and quit being cheap. Quit looking at your friends, Your sister and your cousin. Lusting trying to get what she got or get more then what she got. Great story. I am gonna have to check you guys out..
Wow, I have read some of the other comments. This is why Black ppl cant move forward. I will say it and fuck who gets mad. Yes Most of my black sistas have bad credit. not some not a few But, Most (85-90%) I am a Realtor. I have seen it all. Most black women will buy Gucci bag be4 putting something away for their child's college. And you ppl are really mad at this article? Really? GTFOH!! I find the only ppl who cant talk in a open forum about the ill's of our community are ppl with poor education. This article is lined in truth. Some of you are just not ready to hear it. If Black ppl want the world to change we have to change first. Because most of what we know is wrong.
Lumping all black woman together and circulating this article like its the gospel is wrong.. This may apply to some women as a whole not based on race but as a gender.. There are a lot of women that this does not apply to.. I'm a black single mother and none of these factors contribute to my lack of or struggle to save.. I'm employed not on any type of assistance I do my own hair and nails and my kids are not walking billboards for brand named labels I could go on and on but I won't. What I would love to know is what research was done to obtain these points... Did you take into account that most are living pay check to pay check, the inflated amount of rent, child care, food and etc.. Rise in unemployment due to lay offs...
I am not sure what many of you have a problem with.
You wonder why she is addressing black women, well, maybe that is because she is a black woman writing a blog for people of color.
You wonder why she is addressing "stereotypes", well maybe it's because these things aren't stereotypes. If they weren't statistically happening so darn often, they wouldn't be stereotypes.
I challenge any of the offended on here to go out each day for a week and observe the black women that they come into contact with. How many of them have top notch manis, pedis, and hair (be it weave or thier own). How many are driving a car less than 5 years old. How many are sporting names brands for themselves or their families? And come on, really, how many of you know a black woman who is supporting a man (whatever his race may be)? Dont act like it doesn't happen.
The point of the article isn't how much money a black woman makes and whether black women have jobs or have education. Yes, yes, we know you went to school, you got your degree, you make 6 figures, whatever. That isn't the point. The point is, how much of your money do you keep. How much do you save.
In comparison to other cultures, black people, as a whole, do not tend to save their money. Is that something to get offended over? Maybe. But if you're offended, should you be offended that it is being pointed out that we don't save or should you be offended because at some point in our lives, we know that we haven't spent our money as wisely as we could have. Should we be offended that we haven't learned how to save our money. Should we be offended that we haven't had the examples that people in other cultures have had?
If this article doesn't pertain to you, and you both spend and save your money wisely, and have a retirement plan, and have a college fund set up for your kids, and have less than 30% of your income going out to expenses, instead of being offended, then maybe you can help out the next black woman you see who doesn't understand how to save (and how to spend wisely).
And if you are one of the women in this article, then maybe you can take it as a wake up call to look at who you are and how you are living your life.
Signed,
One who has been on both sides of the fence.
If GOD wants you to give 10%. Throw the money in the air. He can take his 10% or more. All that falls down is yours. The pastors just make a good live for themselves.
Black women make up 75-80% of the Black Church which today seems to be lead by 'Pimps in the Pulpit'. When Black women stop dressing like clowns with big hats trying to impress each other with things they can't afford and learn to say NO to folks that are in messes of their own making, then they will be able to save money.
Thanks Patrice-- you should know you've helped. I am a black woman who, while educated and making good money, still finds it difficult to save/invest/create wealth. I read your article because I'm trying to find out what MY problem is. None of the 5 reasons applied to me, so I was gonna keep searching. BUT THEN I read some of the comments. It's too bad that you're getting so much "hate" from the "self-congratulaters" who are *sooo* offended. If they were truly educated and financially fit, they'd have moved on when they found it didn't apply to them- I think you touched a nerve in some of them- and made a mental note to tell their sister/girfriend/cousin, Keisha, about the article.
DISCLAIMER: Only SOME of the commenters will have a sister, girfriend, or cousin, Keisha, that may or may not have the traits your article lists. Nor is this comment meant to imply that ALL women named Keisha share any of the forementioned traits. If neither the name Keisha or any of the negative traits mentioned in Patrice's article or my comments pertains to you, please disregard and move to another article/comment that deserves your misplaced ire. SMH
Numbers 3 & 4 should have been 1 & 2. Number 5 should have been number 3. So many people live above their means to impress people some of whom they don't even know. Where I live people drive Range Rovers like they are Hondas. Why would you spend that kind of money on a vehicle that is not gonna last any longer than any other vehicle. As long as it gets you from A to B what does it matter?
Kudos to you Patrice. It really made me laugh when I saw your name because I have a "Patrice" in my life who apparently lives the life you describe, to my detriment. But I plan to erase everything that I have as a bill for her as soon as I finish this comment. It needed to be said whether or not the "offended" agrees or disagrees, because I see it every day in my commute and it really makes me sick. But I'm equally offended by the young Black bruthas that I see who exhibit trifleness with the pants hanging off the hips, loud music that they insist on sharing... but GOOD JOB!
One person asked "How do we start saving money?" Just "do something." If you can only save $5 one week, that is a good start. If you can, arrange for an automatic deduction on your pay or an auto transfer at the bank. Just as debt can spiral down, savings can spiral up. You will feel good about it and build some momentum from that. Some people feel like they don't deserve to have savings. Start small, and work out the thoughts and feelings that get in your way. Good luck - and go and suprise yourself!
www.wisdomtogetwealth.org
You hit this dead on!
Funny. I guess the article had limited space. I would suggest if women didn't have kids (out of wedlock) the title would be moot. All people in financial straits have 1 of 2 issues. Children or some sort of disability. So having children in which you are soley responsible for supporting is stupid, which leads to choosing a man that even needs your credit, money etc. is more stupid. If this is a true article what should I do. I'm a black male, single, no children, 40yr., described as sexy, fine, etc. and I'm in the top 1% of finances in the USA. Will I lose what I have built if I choose a black woman? Patrice keep trying to help these sistas! LMAO
InterestIng article but very true, I can honestly say I have people in my immediate family going through the same issues listed here. I have those who love name brand clothes, those who care for their men because they are afraid to loose him, those who can't wait for their checks to spend that money on nails and hair so they can "catch that man", the ones that spend their money on tithes to impress people in da church while they are struggling etc....I disagree with some of the comments that people ought to go out and help these ladies because they don't know any better and they don't know how to save! The issue is that they are ignorant. Not all women of color choose to be ignorant. If you want to know how to save take a trip to your local bank and speak to a consular, google financial tips, go to the library and educate yourselves.Coming up in this family i made a choice not to be like that and not to live my life constantly at the loosing end. So I took my butt to college, got a job to keep my loans low. I am 25 with a college degree. Why am I proud of that? Well because while these ladies were soo busy entertaining men and wasting money on nonsense I decided to invest in myself and my education. Yes now I work for a great company and I have a 6 figure income. I have a 401k, I have a savings account, my bills are written down and checked off every month. I have a set amount that I tell myself that I must save. Who taught me all this? No one but I choose to learn all this. I am not a victim of family members who try to get money from me. Why? Because I made it clear that i work for mine and it's not to be given away that easily. I will not be abused and my money will not be wasted on others if it's not being wasted on me. I will not put up with a man and his smooth talking because that will not pay bills or guarantee a future and he will not be living wit me, driving my car, eating my food or spending my money because i did not push him out therefore I am not responsible for his welfare. A relationship is a partnership and a mans love should not be bought and if it is then it's not real period. I am not offended by this article because it does not apply to me. What does offend me and makes me upset is the amount of negative responses to this article. If it's not for you then you definitely don't care but if it is about you then stop complaining and seek to educate yourselves. To the single ladies with children I know it's hard because my mother was single raising us and the biggest disservice she did to me was worrying about what I wanted NOW as opposed to what I would need in the future, a college education and more importantly a savvy mother to guide me into not making the same mistakes. I had to do it alone but I didn't have to. If staying on top of da latest trends and worrying about what your children will think is stopping you from getting that education or saving that lil money stop it now, go to school (if need be), save that extra money and I guarantee you you' ll see the difference in a few years and your children will thank you once they are old enough.
for gad sake what is everyone getting heat up about, take a chill pill. the author hit the jackpot and some people cant take a bit of advice. take it if it will benefit you and leave it if it doesn't instead of blowing fires at the author anyway, I'm a black woman from Australia and only 21 and my life is on track but I'm not offended by the author in anyway cuz very thing she said I see in black communities too often
Im white, single from the hood ..with 2 jobs no car payment and do my own nails....still broke mama ...any thoughts??
I think first of all we have to have the mind set to save, most of our mothers and fathers back in the 50's did not know how to save because it was not taught to them, so generation after generations , we have learned behaviors that don't help us save, you can save 10 a moonth and leave it alone and save, it does not have to be a big savings, some of us say , what is 10 dollars well it is a start. That star buck coffee you buy everyday and 5 dollars a day x 7 days . not to speak of cigs and weed people buy, and we all know how much that cost...I am a clothes horder, I know why I am not in denial but , I am slowly treating my addiction, god moved me to Arizona, where the conpetition is low for material things, I have learn to live with out nails, hair, do my own feet, no lavish car note, ( dodge ram truck paid for)I am on a fixed income and it is ok to say no I don't have the money to do that, shame is a powerful weapon in the economy world. No I do not want to go out to Eat every day, and I can't pay tites if my lights are out, that is not what I think god wants( my opinion only) I have just enough to make sure everything is paid not late(hate late fees) gas money to get around and if I don't have it I can't spend it, I am a coulprit of bad credit( leason learned, you can't help every relationship finanically) but all in all I still save, not much but some. J ust to say , god can't bless what you won't do. Give it a try you may become addicted to it. Saving I mean.And stop trying to impress your friends are hang out when it cost you money you don't have ,if you have good friends they will understand, and they best friends they will stay home with you and watch a movie , read to each other, walk your dogs together, cause when you leave the house it cost you money... gas, food, etc.
Thank you so much for the reminder. That is exactly what I took it as. I'm am a mother of 2 and have a husband married for 13 years. I have spent so much money that I really didn't have to buy things I really couldn't afford to impresss people that I didn't even know. I got married at 17 and my husband struggled to work. I mean WORK to pay for whatever I wanted. As time time went on in our marriage I began to see my mistakes. Just throwing money away helping out family with no intentions on being repaid. My love for God and and my relationship with God has helped me to see how important it is to be prepared for future things. Now I wear whatever looks nice on me for not so much money, my children have nice clothes but not so much name brand( only on sale) and a really good sale at that which I use coupons as well. I will always buy them good shoes though. Meaning properly fitting and sturdy. I work a part time job but we have everything we need and some wants. I'm never too worried about how things will be paid or how we are going to eat because the bible says at Matthew 6:31 So never be anxious and say, ‘What are we to eat?’ or, ‘What are we to drink?’ or, ‘What are we to put on?’ 32 For all these are the things the nations are eagerly pursuing. For YOUR heavenly Father knows YOU need all these things. 33 “Keep on, then, seeking first the kingdom and his righteousness, and all these [other] things will be added to YOU." So ladies just apply bible principles and simple proverbs. When you know better... You do better! :-)
Lots of truth in this article. I had to laugh especially being Ive done some of these things in the past. I don't believe those things are race exclusive but being that most of the black women I know fall into most of the top 5 just interesting. I say you only get offended if it applies.....
It will come a time in your life when you will say, why did I do all that stuff , I really did not need it our used it. Don't let it be too late for you to understand you are not your things, just being you is ok, not all the material things, the cars , the glamor, does not make you a better person. You can do with out, believe you me, loose your job and see.....be blessed.
Are you serious? Why I just came across this I don't know, but Patrice what credentials do you have to put together a list of this sort honeyyyyy? Please stop. While a few points in your "article" may be true, this is a stereotypical generalization of African-American women. Can you save money? Do you come from a family of black women that have it together financially? I'm worried that you didn't, because I did. None of these points are relative to me, my upbringing and a HELL OF A LOT OF other black women. Your article should be titled, why Black GIRLS —and others with careless and irresponsible tendencies— can't save money.
C'mon now. I know plenty of black women who DON'T splurge on men who wouldn't return the favor; who DON'T spend $400 a month on hair and nails; who DON'T wait in line to cop infant Jordans and Gucci; and who DON'T try to run back to the hood after graduation trying to "stunt" in tricked out Range Rovers. Just stop it with this article. It's giving black women who relate a worse name, black women who can't relate a bad name and those who are on the outside looking in; bad ideas about ALL black women.
Peace, blessing and better blog entries.
Ladies, in general, I think Black Women can save money. However, we do like to look GREAT and have nice things, but that does not mean we can't save money.
If you are women that needs a little extra money for the things you enjoy such as getting your hair and nails done, driving a nice car, wearing name brand clothes, then stop by blackwomenandmoney.com to get some great information on how to support your lifestyle.
The writer of this article forgot to mention reason number 6 which is the most important of them all: discrimination. It is a fact that white women make more money than black women, and it is easier for them to get better jobs and opportunities. Their families also have more money. Do not blame black women for not having enough wealth.
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